Do I need a therapist?

I don’t really know what to say anymore, My life is a real mess, a lot of ideas are haunting me. Maybe I need a therapist because maybe I have a psychological problem.

First , I’m feeling incredibly alone even if I have friends , I’m telling my self that I might need a guy in my life like a friend but I can’t leave it that way because in my mind and according to movies It always ends with love.

Second , I have this one special thing about me , I’m not sure I can call it special . I’ve never been loved my somebody and this is totally frustrating me the whole day . In university or even in the bathroom , sometimes I just start crying and telling my self what the hell is wrong with me . I’m nice with everyone and no one wants to be friend with me .  

I’ve been alone my whole life . I never had a true friend who understands me and everything . And I was used to it  , and every new year I was telling my self that I must change it , and It never happened. Now I’m a college  student and I’m screwed . At school I’m totally  laughing and having fun just to hide my sadness and It’s working but inside of me I’m always thinking why Am I doing this ? is it necessary to act in front of people? . But I just don’t know the answer .

NOW , the biggest problem I have is that everytime I have an eye contact with a boy I strangely thing that there’s something between us and maybe he will talk to me because he likes me, but inside of me I know that no of this will happen It’s just my imagination and a way  to make my self strong and handle this idea of not being alone.

There’s another thing , sometimes when a classmate wants to borrow a pen from me , he talks to me , I don’t know I feel like he wants to get to know me and I get so nervous . this idea is insane It’s pissing me off And I try to change it but I can’t .

Sometimes  in  mornings  I spend so much time choosing my clothes because I want to look nice in front of guys who actually (doesn’t give a damn about me) . And so I tell my self why would I do this things ? 

I never had a boyfriend and that sucks , god damn it I’m 18 . sometimes I just thing that I might want to be a prostitute ( not a real one ) . But I might  to a guy ( who I don’t know ) and whose only job is to kiss me and tell me nice words and who doesn't make  me feel like a piece of shit  . That’s an insane idea I know !!!!!

Anyways I’m not sure if it’s a psychological issue or not , please help me and especially about this idea of EYE CONTACT is it happening to you or Am I the only one ? this is so serious I’m crying right now while I’m writing because I’m badly hurt and damaged. THANK YOU.